During my first week or so at the school, an invisible barrier existed between the students nd myself. I have a feeeling it was because I'm not just a visitor - i am their teacher. No matter what i said , or how I smiled, the students appeared to remain at a distance. Some students returned my greetings and smiles, but even these few were polite and distanced.
One day i decided to join some of my female students who were sitting under a tree in the schoolyard, talking. As I joined them, their energy was tangible - their eyes wide and gleaming. Smiles emerged and gigles erupted as we began to talk. They crowded round me, fidgety with excitement. They asked me many questions about my life, my family, my interests...all the while, the girls moved in closer and closer.
Suddenly I felt one finger touch my left arm, then a hand, then two, three, four....furtive, stolen touches. Like they thought i might not notice. I looked at the owners of those hands and a flurry og giggles ensued, the girls pulled back their hands quickly and covered their face as they laughed. I said" Would you like to feel my skin?" and, as I held out my arms, immediately thier were ten pairs of hands feeling the skin on my arms. "You're so smooth!" They cried! Soon I had hands touhing my clothing, my face, my hair. They buried their facesin my hair, "It smells good!" And shrieks of delight again! They wee all chattering, giggling, touching nd enjoying the freedom to satisfy their curiosity about me. "Even her hands are white!!"
i sat in the centre of this group, smiling. Truth is, thismoment ws equally as fascinating to me!! The smileon my face grew and grew until i felt it might burst the seams! I realized that this moment was full of the joy of life, the thrill of experience, the beauty of humanity. Crazy Joy. The walls were down, the barrier removed....Connection!!
As the thrill of themoment eased we talked. We talked about life, love, sex....we talked about highs and lows, failure and success. All the while these girls were holding my hands, braiding my hair, touching my arms, my neck, my feet. Their eagerness to know me touched my heart, then seized it...and before I knew what washappening they had stolen it forever! I am theirs. They are mine.
The moon came out bright and smiling overhead and the girls asked me if I have any children. I said no. They asked me why, nd I told them the same thing i tell all the children I work with, " You are my children." and now they were really smiling, their smiles grew and grew and shone at me in the darkness of this very special ugandan night....their eyes beaming.
Too soon it was time for them to settle for the evening and i had to say goodnight....as we dispersed, one of the girls spontaneously flung her arms around me and hugged me. When I responded by hugging her back, the other girls burst into another round of shrieks and lughter as they all lined up for their hugs!! Abundant Love.
As i walked back to my dwelling i could feel my heart growing and growing....the joy of the evening lingered lete into the night and, still smiling....I fell asleeep.
"The soul should always stand ajar, ready to welcome the ecstatic experience." -Emily Dickensen